How to Spot A Gentleman.

Dating is legitimately one of the most stressful parts of being a human being - especially a human being in the twenty something age group. You have a million reminders staring you in the face that you are *alone*. You feel pressured to be on every dating app possible knowing full well you won't find a worthy suitor however, you go ahead and waste your life swiping away. When you decide to actually meet up with your tinder-prince or your coworkers "really cool neighbor" or that guy that approached you at the bar that one time, it usually winds up being a total nightmare.

Ladies, I feel you because I have had my fair share of dating nightmares. So, to save myself from ever ending up on the wrong side of a date and keep you from experiencing some of the most uncomfortable moments of the best years of your life, here is a guide to what a real gentleman is.

1. He does not offer to pump your gas at 1am.

2. He spends hours talking about himself.

3. He doesn't enjoy anything that wasn't his idea.

4. He includes racial slurs, degrading terms, and negative names in his daily conversation.

5. He will have relationships with other women behind your back.

6. He will not respect your worth, your property, or your family.

7. He will use your insecurities against you.

8. He will make you feel worthless without him. 

9. He will steal every good thing you hold dear.

10. He will never mean the words "I love you". 

I hope after the first statement you realized this list was as satirical and sarcastic as they come. Maybe that was really harsh of me, maybe that guy is reading this right now with flames coming out of his ears ready to run his mouth - so what. The truth is, shitty guys exist and I am living proof of that. If I had taken one second to really evaluate the situation I was getting myself in to, I can bet everything I own that I would have run so far away in the opposite direction.

All of this to say, that if you doubt for 1 second that he is not a gentleman then he probably is not one. Don't be fooled by loneliness, fancy words, big promises, tattoos, or motorcycles. Don't let seeing another engagement on your newsfeed, another happily ever after movie, or another person's portrayed life affect you. Singleness can suck, Lord Jesus can it suck. But that in no way gives way for you to rush in to something foolishly just to escape carrying around that big scarlet "S".

Take it from someone who spent the better part of a year running around settling for less than the best, that having no boyfriend is infinitely better than having a bad boyfriend. Stay strong, warriors. Stay beautiful, angel faces. Stay confident, sisters. The good ones ARE out there. It is time we start using discernment rather than depression to direct our dating decisions.

A real gentleman will always:

Protect you and your heart

Encourage you through all things

Elevate your spirits

Love you unconditionally

Support you whole heartedly

Speak truth in to your life out of love

Guide you spiritually

Guard you emotionally

Respect you 

Lead with wisdom

Humble himself

Wait with patience and grace for that man.